music: Carrie Donovan - lyrics: Carrie Donovan

    You’re the reason Mommy drinks
    Daddy left because you cry
    You’re the rotten apple
    Of your mother’s eye
    Everybody hates you so do I

Even though you practice hard
You can’t keep the ball inside your yard
All the other kids your age can read
So why the hell you gotta bother me?

I don’t know why it is I hate you so
Maybe it’s just because you’re slow
You’re kind of like a cancer how you grow
A cancer with a finger up its nose

    You’re the reason Mommy drinks...

When you grow up you’ll someday look for work
Probably end up an Aldi clerk
When I avoid your line don’t think it strange
I know you’ll never figure out the change

Now Holy Hell they got what they deserve
A kid who’s fallen off the learning curve
You can’t get on the bike but get on Mom’s last nerve
Your only Facebook friend is some old perv

    You’re the reason Mommy drinks

Maybe kissing cousins are to blame
Your mama didn’t have to change her name
You turned out like you did because it’s plain to see
You got no branches on your family tree